Shark week continues once again here on the 365 movies in 365 days challenge blog and we have a doozey. I was going to save Shark Lake for an Ass Whoopin Wednesday post because it stars Dolph Lundgren (Rocky IV), but not bad ass enough so here it is here. Meredith Hendricks (Sara Malakul Lane) is an overprotective mother and one of the best cops in Lake Tahoe. She had to rescue her daughter from exotic animal dealer Clint Gray (Lundgren) who also happens to be her father. It’s years later and now Clint is paroled and heading back to Lake Tahoe. The only problem is that the lake is infested with some bull sharks that are killing the residents and Meredith has a suspicion that Clint has something to do with it. They’ll have to kill the sharks before it’s too late and they feast on everyone. Lily Brooks O’Briant (Bare Knuckle) as Carly Gray, James Chalke (Don’t Kill It) as Don Barnes, Michael Aaron Milligan (V/H/S Viral) as Peter Mayes, Ibrahim Renno (Gasping For Life) as Larson, Ele Bardha (It Follows) as Ricky, Melissa Bolona (Dog Eat Dog) as Sara, and the film was directed by Jerry Dugan (Between Grass and Sky: Rhythms of a Cowboy Poem).
Like I said above, I was going to use this one for Ass Whoopin Wednesdays, but enough kills/knockouts for Dolph and it’s not really an action movie. This is one of those films that just has too much going on at the same exact time that it kind of ruins the story. Not to mention, this is just downright cheesy and not the good kind. It’s one of those films that features a lot of bad acting combined with some overacting and cheesy moments. I don’t know what it is about Dolph Lundgren that kind of irks me, but he is just so awkward at times. I feel like he struggles to deliver lines and his fight choreography is just a little off at times too. Maybe Sylvester Stallone was right about Dolph after all. There were so many cheesy moments in the film like an old woman whose running abilities in the film is just god awful to watch and the same could be said about grandma in the film. The henchman are kind of cheesy and they get their asses kicked too easily by stumbling Lundgren. The only redeeming thing about the film was Sara Malakul Lane who starred in yesterdays film Sharktopus. I didn’t realize that she was also in this film until I looked it up on IMDB. She is absolutely amazing compared to everyone else, but she’s a little pushy in the film. This is a watch at your own risk kind of film so at least I warned all of you. It’s available on Netflix as we speak and I am going to give it a D+/C- for a final grade because it’s somewhere between those two.
For this week’s Ass Whoopin Wednesday film, I knew I was taking a chance choosing the film I did because it was 1. a sequel that is 20 years too late and 2. it was going to have a low kill/knockout ratio. Nevertheless, I was excited to take the chance to see Kindergarten Cop 2 which stars Dolph Lundgren (Rocky IV) as FBI agent Zack Reed. Agent Reed has just busted Albanian gangster Zogu (Aleks Paunovic) with the help of a unknowing female he cares about named Katja (Rebecca Olson). With her gone into witness protection, he thinks everything is running smooth until he gets word that there could be a flash drive somewhere that a teacher hid that has the whole list of everyone in witness protection. Now, Zogu is on the hunt for the flash drive and Agent Reed has to step in and teach Kindergarten in order to try and find that flash drive before it’s too late. The film also stars Fiona Vroom (Step Up All In) as Michelle, Darla Taylor (Love On The Air) as Olivia, Sarah Strange (White Noise) as Miss Sinclaire, Bill Bellamy (Any Given Sunday) as Agent Sanders, Raphael Alejandro (Badge Of Honor) as Cowboy, and the film was directed by Don Michael Paul (Tremors 5: Bloodlines). To see the rest of the review and to check out the stats, please click here to go to Moshpits and Movies.
For today’s Ass Whoopin Wednesday film, I wanted to check out something else from Keanu Reeves after the news I had heard about John Wick 2. I have always been curious about Johnny Mnemonic and I figured what better time than now and we are promoting a Mixed tag team (man and woman) match this week. In the distant future of 2021, things are a lot different on the planet Earth as corporations now runs things in the world. The way information is delivered has also changed as human couriers named Mnemonics upload information into their heads. Johnny (Reeves) is a courier who agrees to carry an unusually large amount of information that will prove to be dangerous. What I mean by dangerous is that the Yakuza who basically do the dirty work for corporations wants the info in his head and with the help of his new bodyguard Jane (Dina Myer), he will have to do his best to get the information to the proper place before he dies because of it. The film also stars Ice-T (New Jack City) as J-Bone, Henry Rollins (Heat) as Spyder, Dolph Lundgren (Rocky IV) as Street Preacher, Udo Kier (Flesh For Frankenstein) as Ralfi, Tracy Tweed (Sunset Heat) as Pretty, and the film was directed by Robert Longo. To read the rest of the review and check out the stats, click here.
Before Marvel movies became the hip thing to do in the cinema world, there were films that they were releasing that weren’t that great. For today’s Ass Whoopin Wednesday film, we are checking out one of those films in The Punisher which starred Dolph Lundgren (Rocky IV) as Frank Castle, the cop who goes for vengeance after his family is murdered. You see it has been five years since the supposed death of Frank Castle and his family and someone known as The Punisher is taking out mobsters left and right. Only one cop (Louis Gossett Jr.) believes that The Punisher is Frank Castle and he is going after to Frank. Meanwhile the city is in chaos ever since he started murdering mobsters and the Japanese Yakuza are moving in, but it’s up to Frank to stop them. The film also stars Jeroen Krabbé (The Living Daylights) as Gianni Franco, Kim Miyori (The Grudge 2) as Lady Tanaka, Barry Otto (The Great Gatsby) as Shake, Brian Marshall (The Spy Who Loved Me) as Dino Moretti, Nancy Everhard (The Trial Of The Incredible Hulk) as Sam, Todd Boyce (Spy Game) as Terrone, and the film was directed by Mark Goldblatt (Dead Heat). To see the rest of the review, please click here.